​Somedays, I write this blog at night instead of first thing in the morning. As I sit here now, for some reason it reminds of the Evening Star or the Evening Post. Not like Norman Rockwell but like some magazine or newspaper from a childhood memory.  Specifically, back when I was a kid, the Washington Star newspaper had this separate fold-out tucked into the comics just for children. I can't remember the name of the little fold-out but it had puzzles, stories and history lessons about George Washington and the Supreme Court-stuff like that just for kids. Sorta like a Weekly Reader magazine but inserted into the comic section of the Sunday paper.   You could count on it to be there every Sunday and then the Washington Star went out of business.  I was devastated.  I was heart broken.  I was just about 6-years-old and already understood the importance of print newspapers long before their digital downfall. 

​Then much to my delight, the Washington Post started carrying my little fold-out of Sunday bliss.  My hobby; my ritual.  Isn't it interesting how we are attracted to certain things as we grow up?  Things that to other people would never matter but to you, your little world revolves around it and it brings you pure unadulterated joy. 

Even to the point, that 40 years later you are writing about it in a blog.  The thought of its consistency and simplicity brings light to my heart and a smile to my face even now.
 
It is so consistent and simple it is meditative. So is the the practice of writing about the memory itself.  The original meditation is being 6-years-old with pencil in hand doing my "find a word" puzzles, and developing my love of polar bears and penguin by reading the blurbs.  The meditation now comes from being present in this moment in time writing about the joy of my childhood ritual.

So as I finish writing this blog entry tonight, I will remember to get up early and write tomorrow's blog first thing.  After all, it will be Sunday morning and it will be time for my 6-year-old self to be unleashed.  

What simple task is meditative for you?

​This past weekend marked the end of a journey for me.  I finally completed my Master of Science in Yoga Therapy (OOKKK…I still have one assignment to turn in but the classwork and clinics are done!!).  A year ago, before we started our clinical rotation, we were asked to write a letter of encouragement to ourselves from our future selves. After we wrote it, we were to save it and read it when we completed clinic. Here’s what I wrote:

​To: Me
​
You got this!  Be patient with yourself. It will all come in time.  Enjoy the learning process. Enjoy the people you become friends with.  Always show respect and love for your instructors.

You will always be learning and growing.  This was the path you were meant to be on-Don’t forget that and don’t get discouraged.  This will be a transformative year for you.

Always remember that your clients/students will teach you more about yourself than you will ever teach them.

Enjoy the ride-It’s all about the journey.

From: Me 

P.S. My word of intention for the year: Adventure!!


Damn!!  My future self was one smart cookie.   

​I think I should listen to her more often.

​In Steven Hayes' Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life, he writes about the concept of the “Mind Train”.  The “Mind Train” is when we start to buy into our thoughts.  He recommends cultivating other skills to deal with the internal mental processes that cause us so much suffering.
 
We can do this by learning how to watch your thoughts:

• Without belief or disbelief
• Without entanglement
• Without struggle

​Hayes created the “Watching the Mind-Train” Meditation to help.

• Imagine yourself standing on a bridge overlooking three train tracks.  Each track carries an individual train: one carries the “ore” of things you notice in the present moment, one carries your thoughts, and one carries your urges to act.
• While maintaining this visual, bring your attention to something you have been struggling with lately.
• Your job is only to stay on the bridge and watch the trains pass by. If you notice your mind has jumped down into one of the railcars carrying the different “ores” and is struggling with its content, take notice what hooked you. File it away and mentally return to the bridge and look down at the trains once again.
• Continue to take notice of your thoughts for 5-10 minutes. Just watch what comes up for you.

Finally, write down what you noticed when standing on the bridge watching the three trains. 

• How does what you notice relate to the Kleshas (ignorance, egoism,            attachment, aversion, and clinging)?
• How can you reframe your self-talk and let go of attachment?
• How can you begin to describe yourself as being “with a feeling” as opposed to “having a feeling”?
• How does the reframed language shift or change your level of contentment (Santosha)?

 
Hayes, S.C and Smith, S. (2005). Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy.  Oakland, CA. New Harbinger    Publications, Inc.

Satchidananda, S. S. (2012). The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali. Buckingham, VA. Integral Yoga Publications.

Last year before COVID,  I wrote  a piece in my monthly newsletter about yoga and donuts.  Now that a year has passed-I thought I would revisit my love of donuts and dealing with stress.

This time last year, I had just completed my first trimester after I told myself that a degree in Yoga Therapy was "WHAT I HAD TO DO!".  I had the winter break off and life was normal again; if just for a brief month or so.  Fast forward to now. 

My, oh my, how things change!  

December 2020 finished a year in which I am now over halfway complete with school, I switched jobs, I telework 100%, my plantar fasciitis kills me from sitting too much, and I eat less but still weigh the same.  Sounds stressful right? Now, let's put this in perspective. Just one word is all ya need:

COVID 

The vaccine is being distributed and my number #1 priority is manhandling my parents to the front of that line.  

So when I weigh the importance of getting my parents vaccinated to my supposed stressful "issues", my issues are petty, frivolous and ooze entitlement. That ain't cute!!!  It makes me a yucky person so I'm working on fixing that--

Disclaimer: Before anyone blasts me, I also know everyone deals with stress differently. All I'm saying is...don't be a douche.

Here's What I Did To Put Stress Into Perspective

This past summer to combat this insanity (meaning my own self-obsessiveness-not COVID, it's supposed to be self-obsessive...it's a virus, self-obsession is its M.O.), I created a list of important things to remember and I plan to revise/renew it on New Year's Day. 

This list is different than a "gratitude" list because you can be grateful for everything you have and still be an ass-wipe...the richest man in the world is grateful he isn't that homeless person he loathes. So scrap that gratitude list for a moment-you can come back to it later.

We like to put the cart before the horse and gratitude lists are easy.  The real first step when dealing with stress, for me at least, is not being a self-obsessive shitty person...period. 

OR 

To put it more eloquently, if you practice what the Yoga Sutras call AHIMSA, it puts everything into perspective.  Ahimsa stems from our ability to have compassion and respect for all life.   Ahimsa is kindness and empathy.

So...back to my parents and vaccinations-if I didn't practice Ahimsa, would I care if they got COVID or got vaccinated.  Now take my parents out of the equation-Would I care if anyone got COVID or got vaccinated?   No-the only thing I would worry about, the only thing that would cause me "stress", would be that I can't lose any weight. Woe is me!

It's more than just being grateful-it's getting down there in the mud and muck with people because you "know" how it feels.  EMPATHY!!  For me, that is where REAL gratitude originates and where real stress reduction starts.  

​Here's A Snippet Of My List:

• Teaching yoga virtually is not a burden; it's a privilege. A first-world wonderful, amazing privilege. Some of my students are elderly and virtual yoga keeps them safe-end of story.  
• All my Amazon orders, they have to be filled by someone. That someone exposes him/herself/themself to COVID just so I can shop.  Ask myself: What is necessary and what is a nice-to-have item?
• Give without attachment. No one owes me something in return because I choose to give.  Never give because it makes me feel "good".
• All of my good fortune can be taken away just like that.  Reach out to others. Care!

...And so my list goes.  

(NOTE: If you read enough of my blogs, you may notice I'm list maker...gratitude lists, don't be a shit bird lists, grocery lists, bulleted lists, lists about making lists, etc.  Forewarning-I also have an unhealthy obsession with calendars.).